Being Mom

Since being in college and in the "real world" I have occasionally written or called my parents, especially my mom to thank them for putting up with me while I was growing up, not giving up on me, and loving me no matter what.
I was thinking last night before I went to bed of all the things mothers go through, or at least what I have experienced so far and it goes a little something like this........

First you get pregnant and that could have been a fun time...... or not! The next couple of months go by and you start to wake up at like 5:30 in the morning because you stomach feels hollow, it rumbles and you feel like you are going to throw up. This experience then continues throughout the day and you soon find out it is much better to eat something all the time even though your previous life experience has told you not to eat anything when you feel that way! You bring crackers and granola bars to church and feel sort of mean when you bust them out on fast Sunday but that is only after the wave of nausea subsides. Next you notice your pants feel a little snug, ha know like after Thanksgiving dinner and all you really need is to just unbutton the top button! It’s about this time that you sort of want those around you to know that you are pregnant so YOU don’t think that they think you are putting on a little extra weight.
Time rolls on and the 5:30 snack time is replace with going to the restroom. This seems better for a while because you feel better and haven't spent anytime with your head hanging over the toilet seat and having to blow your nose and brush your teeth several times a day and all the while your husband is in the background either asking you if you are ok, which is silly cus, come on look at you, or he is pacing back and forth breathing deeply and making rumbly noises saying "your making ME want to throw up!"
Gradually there is no mistaking the fact that you are prego, because you are wearing shirts shaped like tents and pants that you constantly have to hike up because they keep sliding down from where you want them to be, but put to much pressure on your belly if they sit higher up. The once and a while nightly trudge to the bathroom now becomes a predictable almost hourly occurrence and you no longer turn the light on because you know the lonely march by heart. While you were dating or maybe even newly married your sweetheart told you how much he loved you and how when you were carrying his child he would be so willing to rub your back or feet as often as you would like, and you believed him!! Ha ha! Now when you want to hold him to it, because after walking for a less than 15 minutes both ach and you have to sit down and take a breather just from walking from the parking lot into the store, he suddenly thinks feet are gross and magically, because he used to be good, only rubs in the same spot either too hard or not hard enough!! Then once you make into the store and walking around you walk by a perfume stand or in my case it was Christmas time and cinnamon was in the air and that throwing up problem that has gone away rears its ugly head and you can’t go back to that area of the store, ever!
Those doctors visits that used to be tolerable, because you have finally gotten used to the fact that multiple people are going to be looking and touching that part of your body that you have tried so hard to hide all your life, your belly, and in my case my happy trail went from being a trail to a four lane interstate, now they move lower and once and a while use cold metal spreader things!! But after all the trauma, which you endured all by yourself, you walk away having heard your baby’s heart beat and during the really bad ones might even be holding a picture of a blob they told you had eyes and legs and arms and stuff.
Then comes the puffiness. It ranges from your feet, even your little toe doubles in size, to your face, and all the while your husband, who should say this and friends, loved ones and strangers all smile and say you are glowing, and that you look good. It’s about this time that your belly starts to look like a little sun, with sunrays (stretch marks) radiating brightly out and around your bellybutton! About this time you realize you need to get things prepared and as you start to buy a stroller and car seat or re-arrange furniture and you are sweating and panting and trying not to over exert yourself you think, why did I wait this long!

As the time draws near soon all your other mother friends start walking with you, all the time, so you can jumpstart your labor. You might even get desperate and when you are a week over due you might take caser oil, remind your husband that he will have to wait at least 6 weeks for…… anything he might be thinking of now, or let him talk you, like mine did, into jumping on a trampoline! Which worked!
Then it starts. Lightly at first, then gets worse, the pain. First you’re excited because it has started, this experience you have been thinking about for at least 7 months and then after a while it gets annoying and then you start to worry about things like, when was I suppose to go to the hospital? How far apart are they suppose to be? Finally you go to the hospital. For some it goes by quickly, for some much slower but it all ends the same. Pressure, pain and then a little pink, wrinkled old man, even if it’s a little girl, because all babies look like old men without any teeth, and they put them on your chest and then its really here, and yours.
Now you have this little thing that looks so breakable. And they make noise, lots of noise, but luckily it’s not very loud, yet! Once you get home it’s hard to get up and move around but an amazing thing happens and you can hold your pee for hours again, and you want to because of all that goes along with all that! Because of the hourly bathroom runs you are getting about the same amount of rest as before but now you have someone who is awake with you. I think it’s in the middle of the night when you truly fall in love with your brand new baby. Even though you are tired, sore and maybe a bit overwhelmed at the moment there is nothing else you would rather be doing than taking care of your beautiful, helpless, tiny baby.
At times it feels like it has flown by and other times its like time is standing still but they get bigger, everyday. The sleepless nights get better as they grow and the gas bubble smiles soon turn into true smiles and those times when you leave the room and then re-enter and they wiggle and giggle and are so excited because its you makes your heart melt.
When they get sick or hurt you are in pain with them, wishing you could do anything to make them feel better. This is what mothers do. I want to tell my mom how much I love, respect and miss her. And that I am still growing up and learning just how blessed I have been to grow up in the family that I did. I am finally feeling the unconditional love that a mother feels for her child.
To all you mothers who might read this, the road may be tough and long but someday your little rug-rats will truly appreciate all that you have done for them!! And for all you soon to be mothers, it’s all worth it!!